Saturday, March 28, 2015

Trying to evolve during figure prep.....

When prepping for a figure show, the reality is things are going to evolve. Being the type of person that likes to stick with a plan, this is challenging, especially when you are doing everything you are supposed to be doing, but not seeing the results you want. You're given this meal plan, you follow it to a T, you keep training hard, and yet somehow the number on the scale is staying where it wants. You start questioning yourself, your trainer and you panic. You start discounting all the hard work you've done so far, and go back to the norm, which is cutting yourself down, convincing yourself you aren't going to be able to do the show you want to and zeroing in on every flaw you have. I've got 6 weeks til this show. I am in straight up panic mode. I had metabolic testing done yesterday to see if that might help with a different direction, met with my nutrition coach and she formulated a new plan, so I was feeling a little better..then came the progress pictures and measurements. That really fucked with my head, so going into my training this morning, that's all I had in my head, how shitty I looked in my bra and underwear. I'm being reassured I can do this, that it will all work out, and to trust the process, but it's hard, and going with the flow really isn't my style. All I can say is I'm trying to learn to be flexible, to not see things in just black and white but when you're almost 44 years old, you're kind of stuck in your old ways...I need to remember, every body is different, every body will change differently and my head needs to shut the fuck up.....

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