Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Can't go back to the "old way"....

It's amazing what can happen in a few months time...I'm finding that since I am now 40, priorities have changed, quite a bit in fact...Became a vegetarian, quit quite a few jobs, changed industries, and am now back to doing massage..full circle if you will...One thing I realize is that once you start opening your eyes to things, it's really hard to go back to your old way of thinking. I was ready to give in, and eat chicken a while back, figured it was so much easier to get my protein in, but then I remembered why I became vegetarian, and put that thought out of my head. I thought about how I used to just spend money all willy nilly on silly things that I thought I needed to make me happy, putting myself and my husband into debt, and now I have a hard time spending money at all, even on necessities like socks..how weird is that? I have also shifted my goals with my workouts, entering the realm of powerlifting, yes, me, a 5'1 124 pound 40 year old woman, lifting heavy things and wanting to lift more...no longer the "cardio queen" I once was, although yes, I still do some, can't give it ALL up you know...It's hard though when you are on a different path from so many others around you, they don't get it, and you are made to feel like there's something wrong with you, and sadly there are days I question my sanity as well. I try to remember I am on my own path, and sadly when you are having a lighter lifting day and being given strange looks at the gym, I really want to shout that from the top of my lungs "I AM ON A DIFFERENT PATH FROM YOU SO SUCK IT!!"....of course, I don't...What's the point? I was on a social website for weight loss, still am in fact, but have become bored with it. I get tired of reading about people whining about not being able to have any will power to NOT eat a whole bag of snickers, or how hard it is to work out 3 days a week for 30 minutes, or expecting a pat on the head with a gold star for eating a junior cheeseburger, rather than the double decker with large fries...REALLY!?? Do you think this has been easy for ANYONE who has been successful with their weight loss? It's hard work, stop whining, expecting a pill and a pat on the back...get off you ass, put the effort in, and you might be amazed!! ugh!! Those people drive me insane!! Quite the rant there, sorry.....Get a bit fired up by laziness....Anyway, back on topic, the point I am trying to make, is it's too hard to go back to what I used to be like, and that's not necessarily a bad thing, it's just hard to explain it to the person you are having a conversation with that you are trying to end because you realize they aren't worth your time....Harsh? A bit...but, at least I am nothing if not honest....

1 comment:

  1. Yup. ...and, I might add, it is quite OK to tell people to 'suck it'...from time to time.

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